The End of Mystery Date?

For three weeks running there has been no Mystery Date column in The New Vision. It’s breaking my heart.

In lieu of that, I leave you with a Father’s Day message from that same paper.

“We Also Deserve Gifts” by Hilary Bainemigisha, aka Dr. Love
“We, fathers, are wonderful people, too little is understood about us because most poets pay tribute to mothers. But we are a necessary engine behind the movement of children from our groins, to the womb, and finally, to the tomb. We pay the bills, preserve the family energy and image, protect, provide and police our little empires. We are perhaps the reason why the family kept together as a unit, respectful and successful; why you did not drop out of school to start your journey to self destruction and why your mother no longer remembers her maiden name…I am talking about responsible dads who have realized that it is increasingly difficult to be a dad these days…Our forefathers sowed in fertile land, but we have to really work hard to get our seeds past female goalkeepers…Our grandies had to be picked from drinking parties to be told that their wife has delivers and the would reply: ‘Which one? The fourth or the second?’ Today, you have to be there in the labour ward massaging her back and wondering how devastated your favourite body part will be thereafter…Most of the privileges that came with being a father have gone! We cannot marry as we please, our voices are no longer the final word in the home and we cannot beat anyone for it – not even your child – it breaks the law! Men are marrying our daughters without paying dowry, our wives leave us when we become broke and the children are dying before we do. In our inner soul, we cry, we fear, we hunger and we thirst. Perhaps the only worry you are likely to notice is thirst. Otherwise, we have to wear fur that deceives you that the monkey does not sweat. In public, we act warrior and…what did the president say? A Revolutionary cannot get devastated. Lastly…No, there is no lastly, just bring my gifts, it is our day.”

I have no idea what he’s talking about at the end there and while many of the things Dr. Love mentions don’t exactly stir much sympathy in me, I will take this opportunity to say: I love you, Dad. Thanks for doing all those dishes, for running around with me on the soccer field and the mountain, for watching bad movies on Sunday afternoons - you make a mean peanut butter and bacon sandwich - and too many other things to name here.